Six months ago I took my first stride.
I am thankful to each and every one of you that has read, commented, and shared my writing. Those hopeless romantics that have emailed me their stories and asked for my advice from all over the world have truly touched me. Because the truth is, I still to this day don’t know how to take my own advice.
I started this blog promising candid recollections of the strides I was taking, and it ended up as a journey of self discovery. I also started this blog heartbroken. Am I completely over it? Probably not, but I have made more progress than I could’ve imagined six months ago. I put myself out there and tried to find that spark again. A few suitors truly made me smile, but most were somewhere along the lines of late night pizza ventures, awkward text conversations, and failed dates.
I finally did get that exciting moment where someone asked me, “Are you going to write about me in your blog?” Taylor Swift status, guys.
The main thing I’ve learned is that I don’t need another human to make me happy. Sure, sometimes it’s nice to have someone to text, to go to dinner with, and to fall asleep next to. But in these six months I’ve forged such great friendships that take the place of all those things until the right person comes along. I’d rather group chat my friends, eat like were obese at dinner, and wake up next to them only to laugh at the fools we were the night before, than I would waste my time with someone other than my soul mate.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I want to stay single forever. Although given the fact I’ve fully embraced “cat lady” (i.e. see loaded Facebook wall) this may be inevitable. Just kidding. This once cynical girl has turned into an eternal optimist. Eventually, I will fall head over heels again and I won’t look back in regret. Instead I’ll look back at this blog. I’ll look back at what I accomplished from my first published article on Elite Daily, to the article that is being printed in a magazine for 40,000+ college students in Dubai.
I am damn proud of what that broken heart got me to do.
I’ll look back on single life, because it’s nothing to be afraid of. We’re in our early twenties so why not act like it before we can’t? Because honestly I probably drank too much, I fell in love at midnight too much, I tripped over myself too much, and I likely have too many embarrassing stories for a 23-year-old in the real world to have. I’m not even using the
“I just broke up with my bf I loved foreverandever” shit anymore. I don’t need an excuse to enjoy life the way I see fit. So in six months I’ve owned up to it. I like to have fun. I like cats. I like my vodka extra cold. I like staying out late. I like Netflix binges. I like to sit on the beach or the sidewalk on my lunch break to write.
In six months I’ve traveled to many places. I got a tattoo. I got a promotion. I’ve written the hell out of my heart. I got a headstand in yoga. I got a new fancy gym membership, and started to (finally) get tan again. I lived on. I’m not crying about living in Miami, actually, I’m crying the weekends I have to leave Miami #fomo. I no longer look for plans because “my life is over without my ex,” I make my own plans. Did I ever back track? Sure, what girl hasn’t? You make an excuse in your head and you roll with it as if it’s a smart idea. It’s not. It’s stupid. Really, it’s plain fucking retarded but, hey we all have to learn.
And I learned that one step back to the past doesn’t counteract the bazillion I’ve already taken for my future.
So to all the people looking for something more, the people afraid to change, the people anxious about letting go… It’s never to late to create the life you deserve. Go after it with every fiber of your being. Mold your own destiny into what is rightfully yours. You have all the power in the world to make your dreams a reality – you just have to believe in yourself. Sometimes you have to fall so that you can look up and see all the opportunities you were missing. Or sometimes it’s right in front of you but you don’t have the guts to reach for it. Well, I suggest you take that first stride today.
Because you’ll never get to where you’re meant to go by standing still.
And as for me? I hope you’ll continue to follow my journey. You can expect more inspiration, less sappy shit, and a whole lot of embarrassing recounts. Because I am nothing close to perfect. I am nothing close to healed. But I think imperfection is beautiful. And I think that scars will one day tell the best stories. So here is to more life and all the single strides ahead.
“I walked a million miles until I got to the one step that changed everything.“
– Sonya Matejko